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Can We Admit That “So Tell Me About Yourself? And “What Do You Do?” Are Some Of The Most Banal Interview Questions In Our Repertoire To Date? Let’s Change That.

“I do a lot of things and I my mind is a vast ocean, what exactly would you like to know?”

Chiara Atoyebi
Photo by Christina @ wocintechchat.com on Unsplash

The other day, I was in an interview, and everything was going well. There was a natural banter linking our commonalities like, “I like to wake up early and exercise. You do too? Great!” or “Oh wait, I like black coffee as well. No way!”

“Yes!”

But I knew the conversation would eventually delve into the dreaded exploration of of—me. How do I feel, and how do I think I can bring a program to life?


Let me start by saying that interviewing well is a skill. I like to think of it as a long form of elevator pitch. While the elevator pitch is used for entrepreneurs and creators like me, it still is the same principle when interviewing.

“So Chiara, tell us about yourself?”

Almost immediately, I could feel my fingers tremble in my lap. My mind immediately says, isn’t that what we were doing when discussing my morning ritual? What more can I say?

It’s not like there was nothing I could say, but the reality is that the question is so general, and it leaves a lot open to interpretation, not only for the person answering the question, but for the person asking. Depending on when you are being asked, you may be tempted to divulge your passion for reading and Korean dramas when they really want to know how you can increase profit margins and bond with your colleagues.

In a way, stepping out of a natural repoire with anyone and directing them to have a conversation that can veer into the inauthentic positioning of “tell me about yourself.”

Legit Tips and Tricks From Dad

Hearing that question always brings my mind back to when my dad was coaching me on my first interview. Although I can’t divulge all of his tips (dad wanted me to use everything in the arsenal), I can confidently say that they still ring true today. His winning formula primarily centered around being self-effacing and ready to support members of an organization. I’m sure many people follow a similar plan of action, and you can’t go wrong with that.

Being able to” tell about yourself” requires being self-aware and finding an interesting way to talk about yourself that doesn’t make your eye twitch. (you know this can happen if you’re nervous!)

So, is the key to acing this question anticipating what the interviewer wants to hear based on how well you’ve researched their company? Or is it simply providing honest answers?

According to a 2022 study from Zippia on interview statistics, the average corporate jon attracts 250 applicants and only four to six individuals get called for the interview. Roughly 33% of interviewers decided if they want to hire a candidate within the first 90- seconds of an interview.


I always think you can’t go wrong with an honest answer. It’s easier to have meaningful responses and to pull from a deeper well of experiences and information when you’re being yourself.


But, if you are looking for some standard tips and tricks for answering this age-old question, here you go:

Focus on your strengths: Talk about your skills and abilities that make you a good fit for the job. Use specific examples to showcase your strengths and how they relate to the position you are applying for.

Share your experiences: Talk about your past experiences and how they have prepared you for this job. Discuss how you have learned and grown from these experiences.

Be honest about your weaknesses: It’s okay to talk about areas where you may struggle or need to improve. Be honest about these weaknesses, but also discuss how you are working to overcome them.

Show your passion: Discuss what motivates you and why you are interested in this particular job. Showing your passion for the position can demonstrate your commitment and enthusiasm.

Be yourself: Don’t try to be someone you’re not during the interview. Instead, be true to who you are and let your personality shine through. Authenticity is key to building a strong connection with the interviewer and showcasing your unique qualities.

If you feel your have more tips or comments. Leave me a message below. Thanks!

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The Hardest Goodbye I had To Say Was To My Five-Year Old

If I was any different than I am now, I honestly don’t remembfer. In my opinion if you met me within that last three years, it’s the better version, and we can go from there.

February 22 would have been my daughter’s 11th birthday. I only just now thought of it in terms of years passing. I also realized that this month was ok. I am doing quite well in a way that feels authentic. I am not putting on an affectation to present myself as something; I actively count my blessings. I’ve probably been here before. (Actually, I’m sure I have.)
It’s kind of like anticipating getting off the train, but there are a few more stops to go–but you want to be there already.

Going out, being with friends, moving about the world, and taking risks has been the best medicine. I had moments of being irritable that I immediately attributed to the fact that my daughter’s birthday was passing. But I count my blessings because I have not only felt my memory returning, but I’ve also felt grounded and even emotionally generous. All of this growth signifies that my changes are sticking.

Have you ever wondered about the heaven in the sky?

Have you ever wondered where do we go when we die? I never truly pondered this question because I’d always taken what was told to me at church at face value. I simply believed that all souls go to heaven after purgatory and ultimately we all worship at the footstool of the big throne in the sky. It wasn’t until I’d spent time at hospices and dealt with the reality of my own child’s passing that I began to inquire and encounter something that felt like it moved beyond fiction. It would during times of deep comtemplation, many of which I wrote about two years ago, that

NO ONE EVER REALLY DIES

Losing my daughter to a brain tumor was difficult. It was a sobering goodbye. More importantly, it made a person like me, who has been a lifelong Believer, leading by example, understand that I am human. Even though it is hard to understand, I really know what it’s like to be chosen because through suffering and complete surrender is where you will get the gift. Oftentimes, that’s when you are still enough and alone and broken enough to receive the keys to your real freedom: True Love. Love is power. There is no force more powerful.

A few hours before she took her last breath, I turned up her oxygen and imagined that she would have to keep breathing if the air was flowing through her lungs, but that was just one last effort to hold her. But my heart was ok with it all. I cherished every moment and took advantage of every resource to make memories, which also gave me peace. Although she was the one doing the heavy lifting with her diagnosis, she turned me into a warrior. 

It was just her and me, and it was also peaceful. If that means anything to anyone who may read this–your loved one begins to go before you see it. If you are lucky, you will be able to feel the “spirit,” or what I believe is a holy, benevolent, and peaceful spirit, fill the room. When this happens, you can see what it means when people say, “you come in to the world alone, and you go out alone.” Not only is it powerful to witness, but, it will give you a different perspective on life–you become fearless.

“WOMAN LOST AND RUNS AWAY TO FORGET HER PAST“

In reality I didn’t run, at least not physically, but I absolutely was not fully present. My memory, like my emotions, would go in waves. It took lots of painting to understand that I was grieving although I felt good. That I was more truamatized over watching the suffering and dealing with the emotional rollercoaster of cancer. The pain of feeling helpless and the pressure to be strong for others but even stronger for myself.

Not only did I learn that I am calm under pressure but I had the ability to carry others on my back during tragedy. I learned that when you surrender to your human limitations you access an unseen power. Like Maya Angelou describes our eyes open with a new clarity. For me, the eyes of my understanding first opened to compassion for me and others which is why I largely felt immense gratitude and hypersensitivity for years. It was through making papercrafts, collages, paintings and ceramics that I have learned what the root cause of so many things are for me.

The Otherside of This

Shortly after my daughter Calais passed, I had an intense desire to see where she went. I wanted heaven to be proven to me. I wanted to be shown the place where she went if it was real.

But I feel that through meditation and sheer spiritual pleading, I was shown the cosmos, and I could feel the energy. Although I could only go so far up, I felt this connection to stardust and the galaxy, and then this feeling of love washed over me, although I never saw my daughter out there physically. Yet when we talk about it from the “dust we come and the dust we return,” I feel they are referencing the cosmos.
And each day that I am painting and sewing, I tap into that energy. This practice also helps me write.

Ascending Into The Forever

When my daughter began to wind down and transition, she talked a lot about the moon. Then she saw her grandparents in her room. Finally, she said that Santa was coming and the last time she saw him he was with Mrs. Claus, and she said they had a present for me. All of this explaining to me and watching her gently ascend allowed me to feel so much peace. It was goodbye, yes, and it’s still beyond my comprehension. Yet, it never felt final because I saw her in my dreams. It felt like more of ellipses because she sent me her twin (my daughter Monarch).

So when you try to explain the inexplicable, it’s ok to know that sometimes you can’t. Knowing that you don’t have all the answers and that life can be senseless –signals the beginnings of true understanding.


Although it can be difficult, I learned from volunteering at a hospice and watching my grandparents transition that it is way more beautiful where they are going. They will tell you that if they see it. Although they are not with you in their flesh, they are probably right there with you, and you can feel them. So, even though my goodbye has been ongoing, in many ways, it still feels like she never left.

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“Slow Down, It’s Ok To Be A Kid” And Other Words of Wisdom I Would Tell My 16-year old Self

“This is how you smile to someone you don’t like too much; this is how you smile to someone you don’t like at all; this is how you smile to someone you like completely.”

Jamaica Kincaid, Girl

I discovered this long-lost photo in the shed behind a house we had been renting out, mixed in with torn-out pages and several notebooks and sealed envelopes, all from various moments of writing my morning pages.
I always think of my daughter when I look at pictures like these, many of which I haven’t thought about in years. She is the spitting image of me in many ways and a constant, yet beautiful, reminder of how fast time flies.


Outside of moving around almost every two years and attending four high schools in for years, I largely enjoyed high school. I never wanted to go back, and I never reminisced on it–but I wish I would have appreciated it more. I wish that I would have appreciated what it meant to be a child. But, I also feel I was raised to be responsible and not to make the same mistakes my mother did. For example, getting pregnant at twenty-one or at all! I didn’t smile alot until I left my highschool in Atlanta and moved to Korea. Korea was the place I felt I blossomed, and it changed the way I viewed life.

As amazing as Atlanta was, my family life during that time was going through alot of changes. I was beginning to see cracks in our foundation and even what it looked like to have two partners going for different goals. I think those were the moments in my life that shaped my ideas on family, traditions and what is truly important in life. I don’t often complain because financially everything was great. However, finances, common interests and even basic compatibility doesn’t make a perfect union–it’s all about values and vision. At least that is what I internalized things to mean. Also, my natural affinity towards helping and fixing situations caused me to believe that through perfection and high achieving I could not only be seen, but find ways to make everyone happy. I am sure alot of kids feel that way. Yet what they don’t know is that, adults are adults, and kids are kids. Children have limited capabilities and although they may be treated like an adult, they are not. We do this often in the Black community. We make little men and women out of our kids and skip over the one time in life they will have to be carefree.

I beliveve that the latter is the natural order of things. When we rob our kids of this natural step, I feel the result is many adults existing in a state of arrested development. They are often non committal, confused, self-focused and searching for things outside of themselves.

“We do this often in the Black community. We make little men and women out of our kids and skip over the one time in life they will have to be carefree.”

I feel like I came out of the womb an old soul. I was always thinking, planning and strategizing about things internally and was unable to share them with anyone. The girls and boys in my circle were not interested. That’s why at some point I began to identlfy with the Beneatha Younger character from A Raisin In The Sun. At the time, I felt she embodied the feeling of wanting to express your mind but being seen as an object. But, I think I was also comfortable in my “role.”

Moving to Korea and Ending My First Engagement

Free wedding rings

I remember when my mom said that we were moving to Korea right after I’d had the most epic year of being on the homecoming court and co-captain of the cheerleading squad it was horrible. My mother delivered the news with no compassion accep to say that when she was a child she had to move around and I just needed to deal with it. When I went back to tell my friends, they all got together to come up with ways that I could stay back. We racked our brains about who’d ever done this before and how I could stay back. I don’t remember who said it, but someone said “you don’t have to move away if your married?” I thought to myself, “yes, then I would be an adult. I could also emancipate myself like Drew Barrymore’s character in Irreconcilable Differences!” Someone must have passed the message on to my boyfriend who must have picked up some extra shifts from Piggly Wiggly because he someone proposed with a whole diamond. I’ll never forget it, because it came from Helzberg Diamonds and he spent all of his money.

That night I marched into my mom’s room to tell her I wasn’t going because I was engaged and getting married and I was going to live with Alicia and her mom. My mom sat in the bed barely looking up, so that’s when I showed her my ring.

“What is that?” she laughed.

“I told you, I’m getting married.” By that time my dad walked in ready to co-sign whatever she said. My mom rolled her yes.

“Thats a promise ring and you’re still leaving.”

Over the next few months before I left I cried almost daily. Ultimately she was right. I went on to have a unique experience that changed me. I had the best year ever. I worked with dignitaries, officials, Korean businessman, and celebrities through my job at the Dragon Hill Lodge. I did not get married, and I don’t even know where that sweet young man is, or who he became. I forgot about it quickly–because although I felt like I was an adult, I was a teen.

Now as a mother, I allow my kids to be kids. I also raise them similarly to the way I was raised because looking back, my mom, was the best mom for me. Like I am for my daughter.

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That One Christmas We Asked For Nothing And Got Everything

“Watching everyone relax in the environment I strive everyday to make cozy was the best gift I ever recieved.”

Chiara Atoyebi

The Christmas season in my house is always fun. I make it cozy, memorable, and filled with wonderful smells. My son got comfortable with his virtual school routine this year, and my daughter started hers, so they were used to finding their happiness indoors. In the spirit of generosity, I gave up one of the many spaces I claim in my house so my husband could move his office upstairs with the rest of the family—so we were comfortable. This past Christmas, the kids only asked for one thing a piece. They both only wanted a Sonic toy. I only wanted some fabric since I’m sewing as much as possible in my free time. The goal was to sew these dresses for myself, but I was having issues with my machine, and it was giving me so many problems that I needed help to keep up with my plans. Because of my machine, I had a low expectation that I would finish any projects before Christmas, and this year we were hosting family at our house, and I was hoping to wow everyone with my designs.

Well, needless to say, I was in for a huge surprise when I was given a huge box of dresses from my husband as an early Christmas gift. I almost protested because I wanted to make them myself, but they were so beautiful that I couldn’t say no. I appreciated the attentiveness with the gift because the dresses all have my required length (I like them long), and they ranged from casual to after-five attire. This Christmas, my children, who always get a lot of things, got so much that they were not expecting. But, the best gift for them was opening all their presents with their aunts, cousins, and other family members in one place instead of traveling from house to house. I know the grandparents appreciated it as well. This Christmas, we took care of the food, the extended family took care of the gifts, and we all sat piled up in the family room watching movies, eating, and falling asleep over and over again. Watching everyone relax in my environment, where I strive each day to make it cozy, was the best gift I ever received.

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How To Write A Standout Recommendation Letter For Someone Who You May Not Fully Remember

Writing a recommendation is an honor for both the writer and the recipient. In this video, I give a few quick tips on organization, efficiency, and creating a quick template for highlighting your former intern, student, or employee’s character traits. Overall, you want to always end on a positive note and keep a warm business professional tone throughout the letter. I also have some funny storytelling but at minute 10 we get into the meat of it.

Drop your best tips in the comments for me.

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Top 3 Academic Apps To Help Elevate Your Writing

link.medium.com/ftkXni5gUwb

#academicapps #academic #ai #tech

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Digital Transformations How Women Are Forming Networks In The Metaverse And Shaping The Cultural Landscape

link.medium.com/wPH0SoYhPwb

#nft #digitalart #womenartists #metaverse

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The Leadership journey

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Fiction Friday: Never Would I Ever

A chance meeting with a stranger could change your life forever.

Summer Mitchell wasn’t known for taking shortcuts, breaking the rules,  or doing much of anything really outstanding. Maybe she was known for her good looks, but like so many other things in her life, they were fading. At least she felt so. 

She’d largely spent her prime years being a mother, wife, and physical therapist. The latter fell by the wayside after she lost her daughter Amirah. After that, she just couldn’t seem to get it together. However, she was a really good physical therapist. At least that’s what her patients always told her when she was practicing.

It was tragic that she’d seemingly let it go forever. Although she sat with many regrets she chalked it up to the sacrifices of being a mother. Her kids loved her at home, and even her husband Darius didn’t want things to change. But, at some point, he realized if he wanted to see his wife smile again he needed to do something different. Little did he know all that had transpired as a result of his pushing and prodding her back into the workforce. They both knew it wasn’t because they needed the money, it was because he hated seeing her mope around all the time. The spark that drew her to him so many years ago had faded and he didn’t know how to get it back. Lately, it seemed like his efforts to get Summer motivated had worked too well. Ever since she went to that basketball game with Stephanie, she’d been a different woman. She was working longer hours and hanging out with her friend way more often than he could stand. Darius knew better not to question her or she’d blow up in his face and threaten to leave. He knew he was largely responsible for her outbursts, but he wondered if would it get better or was she gone forever.

***

Summer and Rob stood in the parking lot next to her truck after his game for what felt like the tenth time. It was a cool night, and she was not dressed for the weather. Most nights they stood staring at each other next to the car door or holding hands over the hood. This time was no different except, she was looking to make it come to an end. Every time she looked into his eyes, or he said her name, she felt like running away with him but–something kept stopping her.

“Talk to me,” he said. “Are we just going to stand here or are we going to my house? Talk to me. Or at least stand closer to me.”

His face was illuminated by the lights that hung overhead. Despite her best intentions, they were outside and out in the open. The energy was palpable, and they weren’t hiding. 

“You want honesty?”

He nodded slowly and licked his lips. Summer felt dizzy.

As she was about to speak a gust of wind blew her hair into her eyes. 

He stepped forward and carefully moved the strands from her face. 

“I should pull your hair right now,” he said. 

“I think I would love it,” she smiled.

They laughed. Clearly, they caught each other off guard with their honesty.

He squinted at her and folded his arms.  

“What do you want? Summer? Do yourself a favor and be honest for once in your life.”

“I want you,” she said stepping closer.  “I know I am horrible for it but, I think what I want is to love and support you forever.  I want to be led by you. I want to do what you say and follow you around this world forever. That’s what I want. That’s what I feel when I am next to you.”  She couldn’t believe she was talking like this; it just wasn’t who she was. 

His face grew intense. She saw his fists tense up against the hood. Something about those words leaving her mouth made him want to take her with him forever. She could forget her life, she wasn’t happy anyway. Unfortunately, he couldn’t do that. Despite what it seemed like to the few people he told about Summer, he had a code of ethics. He would never take a man’s girl. He would just force her to leave him.

“You really mean that? You think you want all of me Summer?”

“Yes.”

“I don’t know if you are ready.”

“I don’t know either, but trust me, I could handle whatever you put me through.”

She could hear him breathing. He reached out and pulled her closer.

“Come here.” 

She shook her head no. 

“Why?”

“Because if I take one step closer to you, I won’t leave. Rob, I meant what I said, but I also can’t do anything about it.”

“F-it then, stay with me. Why deny how you feel?” He pulled her closer and tried to give her a kiss. 

Summer put her hand on his chest in a weak effort to create space. Not that she could stop the electricity passing between them. Was this love? No, not like this. 

“Rob, I have kids.”

“Ok, ok, I get it” he sighed letting go of her waist. “So, you’re done with me?”

He kept trying to catch her eyes. If she was done, he wanted to see it. But she kept looking away. All of it was too dangerous.

“Yes,” she whispered. “Let’s go.”

They entered the car and drove down the road in silence. Every now and then she could feel his fingers gently graze her wrist, or timidly reach forher shoulder, all of which sent shivers down her spine. When he reached over and wrapped his fingers around the back of her neck, she couldn’t resist the desire to lean in and offer him full range. 

“You know can’t run from me forever, right?” he smiled. “I don’t really like losing and I don’t plan to.”

“No, I can’t run. I don’t want to run I think I want to just stop.”

He laughed, moving his fingers up to the back of her ears. “You think or you know Summer?”

He clearly enjoyed seeing her flustered. She pushed his hand away.

“Honestly Rob, why me? I’m almost a decade older than you. I am your therapist and I have already crossed way over the line.”

“Why not you?” 

“Why are you pressing me so hard? Slim pickings on the playground?”

“Bro, there you go with that again. I already told you age is a number. Plus, you’re still young enough to have a kid if you wanted to. Not saying you do but…”

“No. I don’t want to.” 

She could feel him still staring at her as they rode in silence. Was he really thinking about babies? She couldn’t think about kids especially being such a horrible mother right now. 

She prayed a silent prayer in her head. Please take this from me.

As much as she knew she should turn away, she still wanted to be his therapist. 

Stay tuned for more and you can read the entire novella soon on Amazon Kindle.

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She Said What? Decoding Sojourner Truth’s famous “Ain’t I A Woman Speech And Understanding the 1850s”

A. Lincoln showing Sojourner Truth the Bible presented by colored people of Baltimore, Executive Mansion, Washington, D.C. ca. 1893. Photograph.

“My name was Isabella; but when I left the house of bondage, I left everything behind. I wa’n’t goin’ to keep nothin’ of Egypt on me, an’ so I went to the Lord an’ asked Him to give me a new name. And the Lord gave me Sojourner, because I was to travel up an’ down the land, showing the people their sins, an’ bein’ a sign unto them. Afterwards I told the Lord I wanted another name, ‘cause everybody else had two names; and the Lord gave me Truth, because I was to declare the truth to the people.” (Harriet Beecher Stowe, “Sojourner Truth, the Libyan Sibyl,” Atlantic Monthly Apr. 1863, 478)

Sojourner Truth, also known as Isabella Baumfree, died on November 26, 2022. Her death had me thinking about the first time I heard her famous speech, “Aint I A Woman.” The interesting thing about history and conversations surrounding memory–is the grey area within the interpretation. For me, nothing can be interpreted fully without taking into account an individual’s sense of self and the psychological perspectives of the community at that time.

Historians have compared and proven the validity of different versions of Truth’s famous speech. Although there was no speech transcript during the convention, her remarks were recounted by abolitionists of the time. Truthfully, how they accurately created two full and different speeches from memory is impressive to me. Perhaps they took notes? Admittedly, something feels incomplete surrounding the information, and I will have to continue my research of the convention. 

However, my initial interpretation of the speech was that she spoke on behalf of her race and on aspects of her womanhood. The reality is that Baumfree was an African woman born into slavery and treated as if she was not a woman in the same way her White counterparts. I often wondered if her laments made subtle jabs at the system and the women around her. 

If the injustices of the past mirror the civil unrest and racial sentiments of today, it is understandable that Truth would convey her true feelings at the convention to some degree. In fact, this was a woman bold enough to run away from her enslavement.

Truth coming to the podium and stating Ain’t I Woman, would be a logical question placed towards people that had to be convinced of her humanity and womanhood. Moreover, it would all make logical sense considering the period of The Cult of True Womanhood (1820-1860) which raised White womanhood to virtue and purity, while subjugating Black womanhood to licentious stereotypes.

What if Truth’s baiting with the phrase Ain’t I A Woman, was her way of waking people up to her plight and the Truth of their own.

Woman’s Rights Convention, Akron, Ohio, May 28 and 29, 1851 

According to the official transcript of the Ohio Women’s Convention at Akron, that took place in 1851 it was recorded that Sojourner Truth commented on education. The purpose of this convention and several others like it, came on the heels of the 1848 Seneca Falls Convention, which fought for women’s social, religious and civil rights. Elizabeth Cady Stanton opened the convention with these words:

“We are assembled to protest against a form of government, existing without the consent of the governed—to declare our right to be free as man is free, to be represented in the government which we are taxed to support, to have such disgraceful laws as give man the power to chastise and imprison his wife, to take the wages which she earns, the property which she inherits, and, in case of separation, the children of her love.” –Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Seneca Falls Convention 1848


Stanton, Elizabeth Cady. Elizabeth Cady Stanton Papers: Miscellany, -1946; Biographical data. – 1946, 1840. Manuscript/Mixed Material.


The need to fight for women’s rights were agreed upon by all women. The only question was who would obtain the rights first. Looking at history and reading the thoughts of the women in attendance at the time, you understand the importance of accepting all people today. If not, you subject them to inhumanity.

You can read the transcript from the convention on the Library of Congress website here. It’ s very interesting and delivers a litany of obvious reasons and examples of a woman’s right to equality, her wages, and her inherited property. 

From The Sojourner Truth Project, you can compare the two speeches for yourself. Given the times, what do you think Sojourner meant? Which speech feels true to you?

Marius Robinson’s transcription:
Published June 21, 1851 in the
The Anti-Slavery Bugle

The oldest account of Truth’s speech that provides more than a passing mention of it was published by Marius Robinson on June 21, 1851 in the Salem Anti‐Slavery Bugle, a few weeks after the speech was given. This version was not the first published account of the Akron speech, but rather the first attempt to convey what Sojourner Truth said in full.

  1. May I say a few words? I want to say a few words about this matter.
  2. I am a woman’s rights.
  3. (a) I have as much muscle as any man, and can do as much work as any man.
  4. (b) I have plowed and reaped and husked and chopped and mowed, and can any man do more than that?
  5. I have heard much about the sexes being equal; I can carry as much as any man, and can (c) eat as much too, if (d) I can get it.
  6. I am as strong as any man that is now.
  7. As for intellect, all I can say is, (e) if women have a pint and man a quart – why can’t she have her little pint full?
  8. You need not be afraid to give us our rights for fear we will take too much, for we cant take more than our pint’ll hold.
  9. The poor men seem to be all in confusion, and dont know what to do.
  10. Why children, if you have woman’s rights, give it to her and you will feel better.
  11. You will have your own rights, and they wont be so much trouble.
  12. I cant read, but I can hear.
  13. I have heard the bible and have learned that Eve caused man to sin.
  14. Well if woman upset the world, do give her a chance to set it right side up again.
  15. The Lady has spoken about Jesus, how he never spurned woman from him, and she was right.
  16. When Lazarus died, Mary and Martha came to him with faith and love and besought him to raise their brother.
  17. And Jesus wept – and Lazarus came forth.
  18. And how came Jesus into the world?
  19. (f) Through God who created him and woman who bore him.
  20. (g)Man, where is your part?
  21. But the women are coming up blessed be God and a few of the men are coming up with them.
  22. But man is in a tight place, the poor slave is on him, woman is coming on him, and he is surely between-a hawk and a buzzard.

Frances Gage’s inacurate version:
23 April 1863 issue of the
New York Independent

The most common yet inaccurate rendering of Truth’s speech—the one that introduced the famous phrase “Ar’n’t I a woman?”—was constructed by Frances Dana Gage, nearly twelve years after the speech was given by Sojourner at the Akron conference. Gage’s version first appeared in the New York Independent on April 23, 1863. 

  1. Well, chillen, whar dar’s so much racket dar must be som’ting out o’kilter.
  2. I tink dat, ’twixt de niggers of de South and de women at de Norf, all a-talking ’bout rights, de white men will be in a fix pretty soon.
  3. But what’s all this here talking ’bout?
  4. Dat man ober dar say dat women needs to be helped into carriages, and lifted over ditches, and to have de best place eberywhar.
  5. Nobody eber helps me into carriages or ober mud-puddles, or gives me any best place.
  6. -And ar’n’t I a woman?
  7. Look at me.
  8. (a) Look at my arm.
  9. (b) I have plowed and planted and gathered into barns, and no man could head me.
  10. -and ar’n’t I a woman?
  11. I could work as much as (c) eat as much as a man, (when (d) I could get it,) and bear de lash as well
  12. -and ar’n’t I a woman?
  13. I have borne thirteen chillen, and seen ’em mos’ all sold off into slavery, and when I cried out with a mother’s grief, none but Jesus heard
  14. -and ar’n’t I a woman?
  15. Den dey talks ’bout dis ting in de head.
  16. What dis dey call it?
  17. Dat’s it, honey.
  18. What’s dat got to do with women’s rights or niggers’ rights?
  19. (e) If my cup won’t hold but a pint and yourn holds a quart, wouldn’t ye be mean not to let me have a little half-measure full?
  20. Den dat little man in black dar, he say women can’t have as much rights as man ’cause Christ wa’n’t a woman.
  21. Whar did your Christ come from?
  22. Whar did your Christ come from?
  23. (f) From God and a woman.
  24. (g)Man had nothing to do with him.
  25. If de fust woman God ever made was strong enough to turn de world upside down all her one lone, all dese togeder ought to be able to turn it back and git it right side up again, and now dey is asking to, de men better let ’em.
  26. Bleeged to ye for hearin’ on me, and now ole Sojourner ha’n’t got nothin’ more to say.

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“What Is Ours?” A Group Exhibition presented by The Women’s Caucus for Art Washington, DC.

As many of you know this art journey has been my soul’s journey and serves as a well spring of healing. Especially when it is created among a sisterhood. Please join us for an evening of poetry and connection this September 8, 2022. The exhibition will be at the Sandy Spring Museum. There will be an open mic night and we encourage you to come through and speak your mind. Register: The Sandy Spring Museum. See you there!

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Civic Arts Presents An Inspirational Interview With Artist & Life Coach “MUSE”

An interview with Melissa “MUSE” Colon to liberate your mind

Melissa “MUSE” Colon is a certified life coach and artist who is also the creator of the popular Pep Talks Workshop. She is a newly minted mother of a month old daughter and in today’s interview she speaks with us about purpose, tribe, entrepreneurship, and the importance of community for women.

There are so many gems in this conversation–you won’t want to miss it. I definitely consider myself both a follower and friend of this very magical women.

*Before you click away from the page. Please be sure to scan the QR code or visit our link and give us some feedback on your creative life.

As always, I am here for you in the comments.

Peace be with you and enjoy,

Chiara

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Where Do You Go For Culture & Creativity

Calling all artists, writers, creatives, makers, dancers and patrons of the arts. We want to know where you go for culture and creativity. Please Scan the QR Code and take our survey. To learn more visit: The Arts and Humanities Council of Montgomery County. #dmv

Best, Chiara

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World Refugee Day: An Interview With Author and Activist Warda Mohamed Abdullahi On Welcoming Refugees, The Importance of Education, And Inspiring Young Girls

Photo Courtesy of Warda Abdullahi

#ICYMI June 20, 2022, marked the 71st anniversary of World Refugee Day, which is the United Nations’ international day of observance for refugees worldwide. According to the United Nations Refugee Agency (UNHCR), the world is witnessing the highest recorded levels of displacement in history. Over 70 million people have been driven from their home countries due to war, conflict, and persecution, and 30 million are under the age of 18. If given a choice, refugees would almost always choose the familiarity of their culture, the security of their family, and the safety of their homeland.

However, when fleeing is a matter of life and death, they must choose life.

This year’s Refugee Week theme surrounds healing and safety with its motto being: Whoever. Wherever. Whenever. Everyone has the right to seek safety.

“People escaping violence or persecution must be able to cross borders safely. They must not face discrimination at borders or be unfairly denied refugee status or asylum due to their race, religion, gender, or country of origin.”

“People escaping violence or persecution must be able to cross borders safely. They must not face discrimination at borders or be unfairly denied refugee status or asylum due to their race, religion, gender, or country of origin.”

UN Secretary-General António Guterres

America essentially is a nation of immigrants and asylum seekers. All of whom, in the spirit of entrepreneurship, faith, family, and the intense desire for a life of democracy and freedom — wound up here. All of which was done with the help of strangers, the kindness of neighbors, and a supportive community. Even those of us whose ancestors were stolen from their native lands and stripped of their free will, all while being subjected to violence, had a strong desire for America’s promise of a better life. That desire is something that not only I benefit from, but culturally we all benefit from as a nation.

My interview with Warda is not a simple refugee story but of a woman finding her voice and place in the world. Both of those things resonate with me, which is why speaking with Warda was so inspirational. She lost her mother early in life and had to live apart from her father and find refuge in the United States while facing discrimination and overcoming the intense feeling of isolation. Something that refugees often experience when they arrive here.

However, no matter what life threw her, she stood boldly determined in the face of rejection and setbacks by keeping her faith, never compromising her identity, and maintaining a positive mindset. For Warda, it was the dreams of her father and the burning desire for education — and the hope of one day becoming a doctor and helping her community that was her mainstay. While this mom of two is still on her journey, the rewards she gained after her many sacrifices in pursuit of her American dream, will bring tears of joy to your eyes.


Warda’s Interview

Before we dive into everything else, would you please introduce yourself and tell us a little about your background?

My name is Warda Abdullahi, and I was born in Saudi Arabia. I have lived in many different places throughout Africa, where I faced many obstacles, such as loss of education, living through a drought, and losing my mother. But after everything, I still succeeded. I live in Minnesota now. I graduated from Saint Catherine University with a bachelor’s degree in Public Health while I wrote the book, “Warda.”

Why was it so important to you to be the first member of your family to go to college? What did that represent to you?

It represented change, a look into a better life and ditching our former nomadic pastoral lives. The Somalis have this saying which directly translates to “the last camel’s following the first,” so I wanted to be the first to create a chain reaction of success.

What was your first impression of school in America?

On my first day of high school in America, the school was big, and there were so many students, unlike in South Africa. Schools there are smaller, and there are not many students. I was confused. I had never seen students talk back to their teachers. It was certainly a first for me. Back home, we were taught that teachers are our second parents and should always respect them. Treat them as our parents. I could not stop thinking about how this student was not taking advantage of their opportunities around the world; kids their age pray to have an education every day. However, it has alway have been a dream of mine to have access to the best education in the world and despite everything I have been through, it was a fresh start for me where I could pursue my goals and dreams.

Has your relationship with academia been what you thought it would be? We see you have plans to pursue another degree…

Since I was 6, I have always wanted to become a family medicine doctor or a pediatrician. I will continue to pursue that dream, and any additional skills I may acquire will help toward that.

Your mentor, Mackenzie Wellman, wrote a beautiful afterword for your book. How did you two meet, and how did your relationship with her shape your life?

We met through a mentorship program during my junior year of high school at Ottawa Hills High School. Through the years of mentoring me, Mackenzie Wellmen became a family to me. She often comes down to Minnesota and hangs out with my family. She is the kindest and most caring human I have ever met. I am honored to have Mackenzie as my mentor as a first-generation student; she was a godsend as she guided me through applying to scholarships and different universities.

Obviously your story is one of resilience, but it is also one of hardships and self doubt — what kept you moving forward?

My father was my biggest supporter and motivator. He encouraged me to never give up on my education. He always reminds me of how he didn’t get the chance to go college and how all his hopes and dreams had been taken away.

I grew up in a place where every child’s dream was to have an education but was not available or affordable. Because of this, I made it a point to take advantage of the opportunities around me.

You identify as Somali-American, but you’ve lived all over (rural Ethiopia, South Africa, Saudi Arabia, Michigan and now Minnesota ). Do you feel connections to all of these cultures? How so?

Yes, I do feel connected to all these countries I have been to. Even though I was born in Saudi Arabia, I was raised in Ethiopia and this is the country that I am most connected to because I grew up and where most of my family is from. South Africa is the country where my journey to education started and I met my father after 10 years.

Can you discuss some of the unique struggles faced by refugees? You’ve mentioned the importance of highlighting the inequities and injustices that determine who moves freely and where they can live.

Some of the inequities and injustices refugees face are no access to food and water, also education. Throughout my life, refugees have been facing inequalities and no opportunities of education and I believe unless we do something about it, it will not change.

What’s next for you?

My future goal is to go to medical school to become a family medicine doctor and to raise my kids.


Looking Forward

Even when you feel that you are all alone, you are never truly alone. There are always guides, strangers, teachers, friends, and those you have yet to meet, waiting to help you along your path. If we can give aslyum seekers one thing, let’s give them hope.

Every 20 minutes As for aslyum seekers around the world, the journey to America’s gates remain a lighted path to hope and opportunity. To learn more about how you can help welcome refugees visit Welcome.US or the United Nations Refugee Agency to learn more.

For more information on Warda and to read her book visit: https://wardaabdullahi.com